Recap of the Second and Third Years of Medical School

I stopped writing during my second and third years of medical school, not due to a lack of amazing things happening, but due to an overwhelming lack of time. I successfully passed my USMLE (United States Medical Licensing Exam) Step 1 after studying for approximately 6 months. This exam score helps to determine your competitiveness in applying for residency programs. Certain residency programs such as Dermatology, Neurosurgery, and Radiology are more competitive and require top board scores. I did well enough to get into the residency I desire. I then transitioned to the third year of medical school. During USMLE Step 1 studying, my medical school boyfriend and I broke up due to the extreme pressure we were under amongst other things. We tried to rekindle our relationship after the exam was over, but the damage had already been done. Third year was also stressful as we both started surgery block.

Surgery rotations were fascinating to me and I enjoyed being in the Operating Room. However, I could not picture myself waking up at 5 am or earlier everyday to operate and function as a normal human being who still had a family and life outside of medicine. My chief resident and intern were both females when I began my surgery block. They were great mentors who said that you should choose whatever specialty you love, as you don't want to spend time at work doing something you hate, because no matter what, you'd be spending a lot of time at work. I saw a lot of cholecystectomies (removal of gallbladders), hernia repairs, and bowel resections. I also had the privilege of working under pediatric cardiothoracic surgeons at Riley Hospital where I saw congenital heart disease repairs. These physicians worked miracles, allowing a heart that would not allow the child to survive past one year of age, a chance at life. Observing these surgeries peaked my interest in congenital heart disease and possibly becoming a pediatric cardiologist in the future. I was able to first assist one heart surgery of a young boy with hypoplastic left heart syndrome. The surgeon did not have any other residents or fellows available and thus I was asked to stand across the table from him and assist him with knot tying, cutting, and even cutting the superior vena cava. In those moments, my adrenaline was rushing and I felt amazing. Another cool surgical subspecialty I observed was transplant surgery. I was able to see an organ procurement. This is where after a person passes away, they take or "procure" their organs to give to another human being. On the transplant team, I was able to see a mother's best friend give her kidney to the mother's son.

After surgery, I rotated through anesthesia, OB/Gyn, Neurology, Medicine, Psychiatry, Pediatrics, and Family Medicine. I thoroughly enjoyed Medicine and Pediatrics and thus decided to pursue a combined Medicine/Pediatrics residency.

You must study until your brains come out

Imagine sitting down everyday for 8 hours to study and still not feeling like you are studying enough. This is medical school. You will cram more information into your brain than you have in all of your years past. You will make up mnemonics to remember the names of the hand bones such as Some Lovers Try Positions They Can't Handle. Sometimes, you will forget what the mnemonics even stand for. You will have to look at the heart from some obscene angle and identify exactly what cusp you are looking at. You will have to look at the human body from many angles, from the tiniest speckle of a cell to the heart to the circulatory system to the wholeness of the human body and spirit. At the beginning, I had a voracious appetite to learn all I could about the intricacies of the human body, but with time, you get burnt out. At least by the time I was burnt out, it was time for winter break. I never feel as if I am wasting my time. I am excited to be doing what I am doing. However, when you get free time, you must use it. After I finished the semester, I took the polar plunge with my fellow classmates. We took a dip into Lake Michigan when it was approximately 30 degrees Fahrenheit outside. It was invigorating and wonderful. If you are wanting to go to medical school or imagine it in your future, you will have to make a lot of sacrifices. You will study more than you ever imagined. But, it will all be worth it.

How can love fade so fast...

Everyone said my relationship was doomed from the moment I got accepted into medical school. I tried to tell myself it could work if the foundation of our relationship was strong. Circumstances do matter and contribute to the death of a loving relationship. However, for me, it was more than medical school that separated us. I always have to separate from a person, when they begin to lose site of themselves. Women are attracted to men and men are attracted to women because of the qualities they possess when they first meet them. This is why you have to maintain yourself in a relationship, in order to keep your lover coming back. You must keep your independence and you must always love yourself first before you can have a strong committed relationship. I want to be with a man, who has his own interests, his own life, his own passions. I never want to be his only passion. My previous lover was a gentlemen, a smart man, a family man, a wonderful son, a giver, and a teacher. Any woman would be lucky to have him as her mate. However, I am not every woman. Love is a tricky and dangerous situation. You try to further your relationship and love each other more and more. However, sometimes you get to the point where you lose site of your self in each other. I do not believe this is healthy. I still think he does. He wants to be with another women who will codepend on him, and that's just not me. Many of my other classmates have broken up with their significant others. It sucks. It makes us seem like we are going to be cold-harded doctors. However, in my mind, I realize what my life is going to be like, and only some people are going to be willing to stick around for that. I am sad that a two year relationship can be over so fast, but, in the end, it is for the best. I am excited to travel the world and do whatever I want to do. I don't really think I will settle down for a while. There are so many things that I want to do. All in all, whether you are in medical school or high school or working 9-5, two people coming together does not equal one. Always love yourself first. Make sure you make time for your own friends. Let your significant other hang out with their friends and family and do not make them feel guilty for doing so. Take a day for yourself. Give each other breaks. This will lead to a long and fulfilling relationship, rather than one in which you burn out too quickly. Never give up on love.

"I want to go home with Alex!" Adventures at Camp Riley

The last month of my summer before starting med school I had the opportunity to be a camp counselor at Camp Riley. The camp was located at Bradford Woods, a beautiful place in southern Indiana. More beautiful than the scenery that surrounded me were the hearts of the people residing in the cabins. Arriving at camp with my best friend, we had no clue where we were supposed to be or who are campers were. I had come to camp with nail polish in hand prepared to meet a cabin full of girls. To my surprise, I was going to be living with thirteen to fifteen year old boys for a week. The first camper I met was Ben. Ben was quiet at first and after I asked him if he was excited for camp, he replied, "can we go to cabin now?" Camp Riley is a camp for kids, some with limiting factors, that we toss out the door, and then challenge them to overcome obstacles. Some of our campers had diagnoses such as Cerebral Palsy, Autism, Spina bifida, and other congenital disorders. The counselors were never told any of the childrens' diagnoses and I think this was for the best. You were to look at the child as a child, not an autistic child. You were to figure out his likes and dislikes, his struggles and strengths by getting to know him. Back to Ben. . . Ben's parents were older and very kind. Ben's dad said he loved reading his book to people, and I asked Ben to show me his book. Ben showed it to me and was very happy. However, as we waited in line to have Ben talk to different people and for his parents to fill out paperwork, Ben became restless. It was noisy in the building and hot. Ben started swinging his book behind him back and forth. He kept saying how he wanted to leave. At first, I did not know how to deal with this boys sudden frustration that was turning violent. His dad knew how to talk to him and how to handle the situation. He taught me how to get Ben's attention and how to help him. That was not the end of my education for the week. Ben was in his own world. He also brought his friend Will into his world, another one of our campers in our cabin. Ben would scream Will's name as to say YOU ARE MY BUDDY! Ben also liked slamming doors and colliding toys together. He turned out to need more than one counselor to attend to him. One day, we worked with Ben for 2.5 hours trying to get him to take his medicine. He hit us, he hit himself, he tried to push the medicine on the floor. It was only until we put the medicine into chocolate ice cream that he finally took it. And, you know, how can you blame a kid for wanting his meds to be placed in ice cream. I wouldn't have them any other way. Ben loved ice cream and pools, completing 58 laps in the pool for his challenge, a kid after my own heart.

Another camper Ronald wanted to be a doctor when he grew up. When the nurse came at night to give the other campers their medicines, Ronald would help her out. This little future doctor had a ton of energy and wanted to do everything. He swam in the lake, helped out at dinnertime, helped the other campers wheel their wheelchair, and always did it with a smile. At the end of the week, Ronald's mother was the last to come to pick up her son. Ronald waited and waited with the counselors. I told Ronald if his mom didn't come to pick him up before midnight that he could come home with me. Ronald said, "Yeah! I'm going to come home with you!" He asked me a bunch of questions, if I had room, who else lived at my home. I told him we could eat pancakes everyday for breakfast. He replied, "Well, we might get sick of pancakes, what about eggs and ham too?" I asked him if he could cook anything. He said, "Brownies and cookies." I said I could live off a diet of brownies and cookies :)

I have a lot of respect for the camp counselors who stayed for 9 weeks caring for campers. It was a rewarding and exhausting experience. My patience grew immensely and I felt increased joy for small things. I can understand how the look in a person's eyes means they are happy or sad. I looked at the face of a young boy who was overjoyed that the entire camp sang happy birthday to him and felt his joy. Human beings, whether they are different races, different nationalities, different cultures, different religions, have different political views, or have different abilities, all experience the same emotions and are all connected to one another. We must learn to love each other and understand each other. That is why we are here.

I plan to go back next summer, maybe for two weeks!

Relationships

How do you manage medical school, let alone any type of graduate school or career, and a relationship? Well, I guess I'll just have to wait and see. They say a relationship can maintain itself during medical school, but that it won't really grow or blossom throughout this time. That might be something people say, but honestly, why should one ever go with the norm. When you find someone you love and they feel it too, I believe that nothing should separate that bond. I am currently in a relationship and torn over how fair it is to him to be with me. I know people can make it work. You must make time for your bf/gf and they must understand when some dates are simply getting coffee and studying at Starbucks. Compromises and getting through difficult times are for the strong, people who are confident in their love for each other. While I worry about my relationship and hear horror stories about medical students breaking up with their bf/gf, one must experience things firsthand and defy the odds. That is all for now, I'll repost as I experience triumphs and tribulations within my relationship during medical school.

My dreams

I am so excited that I finally got accepted to the Indiana University School of Medicine and Midwestern University in the middle of December 2010. Since then, I have been doing some independent studying either from things I've seen at work in the ER or from stuff that interests me. My future dreams include having my own practice. I have done some research and seen how I can integrate technology and concierge medicine into a wonderful primary care practice. I want to charge my patients a flat fee for the year based on their age and health risks and family medical history. Then, I will stay connected to them via the internet and keep track of their health, fill their prescriptions, give them online counselling, or allow them to quickly schedule their appointments online. I will cut back on costs of paper, receptionists, etc. and people will not have to worry about having insurance and I will be receiving money upfront. This could possible be sustainable... I will need some more fellow doctors and a few PAs and NPs. I am so excited!!

Chew on this.

Over 30% of adults in the United States are obese. Clinically, this means having a body mass index of greater than or equal to 30. The statistics for children is around 18-19% obesity rate. We MUST do something about this. We have the knowledge to know better, yet we still don't want to commit to eating better. I work in the ER and see people with all kinds of health problems that could have easily have been prevented. Type 2 Diabetes left unchecked resulting in loss of vision or loss of feeling to the legs or loss of a toe. Heart problems due to obesity. Respiratory problems from smoking. We MUST start taking care of ourselves in this country. Yes, jobs are important to make a living, but you must be alive to work. Thus, your body is the most important tool that you must take care of.

If I could give people a few tips, they would be to increase their activity and decrease their consumption of processed foods. When they go grocery shopping, park far away and only shop the perimeters where the produce, deli, meat department, and dairy is. Cut down on eating out. Try to make a family activity more active by going to a park or signing up for a 5k.

There is no excuse for cutting your life or your family members lives short.